#THROWBACKTHURSDAY

On the first Thursday of every month, I share with you a post from my old blog 'TeenagelifeBeth'. My next post will be on 02/06 so please stay tuned!

This month's throwback post is from 2015 and it's on dealing with my parents divorce...

Subject: DIVORCE

Hey!

For today's post, I wanted to talk about something that's going on in my life at the moment and I know it's not just me experiencing it as it happens to a lot of kids every year. That is, my parents got a divorce.

I guess in some ways I'm kind of happy that my parents are divorcing because they were constantly arguing, day and night, and it always used to make me really upset and just want to hide in my bedroom and not come out until everything was calm again.

On the other hand, it's kind of scary that they're getting a divorce. I guess it's because of the fact that I now live with my mum so at times when I need my dad to help me with something (especially getting rid of spiders and maths homework) he's not really around that much anymore and I'm just finding the whole process of their divorce hard to deal with.

I guess I have had time to get used to the idea. Around this time last year, me, my mum and my brothers moved in with my uncle (my mum's brother) because, as my mum put it, "we're moving in with your uncle and your dad's staying at home because he needs to sort the house out" (I can't remember exactly what she said). When she first said we were moving out I thought she was going to say it was because she and my dad were getting a divorce and I got really panicked about that thought and I felt really sick from that day (a Friday) to Monday. Especially Monday as some people seemed to have a more clear idea about why I was living with my uncle and it made me think they knew something I didn't.

This March I was packing to go to Disneyland on a school trip and in the suitcase I was using I found a folder that said something about solicitors. Me, being the nosey person I am, opened the folder only to see something that confirmed my fears. I remember reading subject: DIVORCE and I got so angry for some reason that I threw the folder across the room and sat on my bed and cried. I guess I was angry about the fact that I had been lied to for months.

I never told my parents about me finding out. I guess I was too scared to. Plus, part of me wanted to wait and see how long it would take them to tell me. The answer - SIX MONTHS!!!

Around the end of September, my dad told me that my mym wanted a divorce from him. Obviously, me finding out six months beforehand, I acted like I couldn't care less. Then he asked me and my brother if we already knew. I said yeah but didn't tell him how I knew. Turns out my brother knew as well. His friend had overheard a conversation between his mum and my mum about it.

I know that everyone's experience with their parents getting a divorce is different but it's kind of the same in that everyone takes a certain amount of time to realise that, at the end of the day, everything's going to be fine. Yes, your parents may be getting a divorce but it doesn't mean they don't love you any less. It will take time for you to get over it, but in the end, you're okay because you realise that this happens to many people. And, in some cases, your parents will argue less and sometimes even not at all.

I used to like the fact that my parents were together as it felt like it was making my life easier with things such as Christmas and birthdays as I hardly had to worry about anything. Yes, the whole thing is scary but I'm just glad that it makes my parents happy. The subject hasn't been mentioned since the day my dad told me, which is great. And my parents can be in the same room together and hardly ever argue (come on, I've got to let them have a little argument here and there).

This whole experience has been tough and what would've made it easier would be if I had someone whom I could talk to about the whole thing. If you want to talk to me about ANYTHING, whether it's to do with today's post, another post or life in general, please don't be afraid to contact me. My Twitter is @lifeofbeth761 and my email is lifeofbeth761@gmail.com so feel free to talk to me any time and I'll always answer you.

Love Beth xx